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| Circa 2007. I couldn't handle the hipster glasses, so I bailed. |
It was exhausting, y'know? Like, I am never starting a blog about him again. Like, ever.
But that doesn't mean I'm not going to see his movies anymore. It just means I'm not going to see his movies on opening weekend anymore. (Although, if you've read my book, you know that even during the height of our power-couple-dom, I never saw his movies on opening weekend...but that's beside the point.)
In summation, I will be back sometime (I don't know when) with a movie review. But in the meantime, here, please enjoy Taylor Swift's breakup song about this Jake character, which is literally the best thing she's ever done, although only the second best thing ever written about Jake. (The first being my book, obvs.) TaySwift is, lest we forget, famous for her Top 40 Romeo-and-Juliet-you-belong-with-me-back-to-November brand of saccharine love songs, but three months with Jake and she cranked out an I-can't-believe-how-lame-you-are breakup anthem, and of course she did, because HE IS THE JAKE GYLLENHAAL OF MOVIES.
(TaySwift has NOT, however, ever come up with a Civil War album internet rumor about Jake, and for that reason, this song is best enjoyed if you pretend it's me singing about blogging about him instead of her singing about her "actual relationship" [or whatever] with him. It's all about me, always. Never forget.)
THE END.
Hahahahahahaha! To just... everything about that...
ReplyDeleteThat song and this post just KICK ASS Becky! LMAO RFLMAO LOL and what Malin said
ReplyDeleteHUGE thank you to Sam for pointing out this song's existence to me yesterday!! You should have seen me watching the video for the first time. I was amazed by its hilarity. And I immediately thought, "What would Prophecy Girl say about this??" :D :D :D
ReplyDeleteWhen I first heard this song I was in the car and laughing so hard at all the little one liners that pointed so directly at Jake. After it finished the hosts were discussing who it was about and didnt really mention Jake. I could have strangled them if they were infront of me!
ReplyDeleteCant wait for the review Becky!
When you first said you knew it was about Jake, I was like, 'Is it really that obvious that it's about him?!" AND THEN I HEARD IT. NO QUESTION!! Hahaha, and the video makes it that much better!! I can't believe anyone would miss who was the target there! (The part about listening to indie records "much cooler" than Taylor's is maybe my favorite part of this song. God, that is SO JAKE! :))
Deletefuck it - the video isn't availably in my damn country.
ReplyDeleteanyhow, a song about her and jake was overdue (if it is a recent one).
and about how interesting he is: well I honestly have NOOOO idea where he is and what he does etc ... and did't we all had a time where we had a more or less good insight of his whereabouts o.0
Annie Sasha
If you have the chance to try to track this down on a site you can watch the video from, I think you'll really enjoy it. :)
DeleteAnd yes, this is Taylor's latest hit - I didn't even know about it myself until a few days ago!
I still get e-mails from people from time to time asking if I know where he is and if I can help them find him, so there are a few out there who are still keeping track. But I'm glad I'm at a point in my life where I can write them back and say with complete honesty that I have no idea where he is on any given day. :)
okayyy I tracked it down... x)
Deleteand on totally unrelated note: that is exactly the feeling I have about someone where I used to think till a couple weeks ago I would get back together with ... but no - there is no way. he will always have my love of some kind - but there is no way (I don't think he wants to, but it is nice to know I am over with that idea) LOL how self centered can I be sometimes ... making a song of T.S. about J.G. a subject of my life *ggg* oh yes you may hit me with that bat
Annie Sasha
Taking things in other people's lives and making them fit your own life...it's the Becky Heineke way!! :D Seriously, though, I completely understand where you're coming from. And I'm glad at least you've found some peace with your situation. :)
DeleteSorry but I just can NOT stand her. I felt this way about her a long, long time before Jake. So, this makes her even that much more annoying. However, like a bad train wreck . . it's impossible to avoid her. From the little snippets I've heard of every song she's released so far from her new (do they still call it an album?) release . . Red . . . it sounds like the entire goddamn thing is about Jake Gyllenhaal. I find it hard to accept this one song is just about him. She obsessed over him and I'm sure smothered him . . which only (I'm sure) made him think she was clingy and a psycho-freak. I can't blame him for wanting nothing to do with her. It seems like she's this way with every guy . . but with him it was much worse. I think she got him and thought she was going to be a Hollywood princess. Now she's obsessing over this Kennedy kid and he's too young to know any better. Right now I'm sure he's flattered. I'm only hoping the kid wakes up soon. It will be nice when she's finally 35+, fat (like her mom), and is living in some hellish life where she's not making music anymore because all her tweens figured her out for what she really is. That time can't come soon enough. She makes my skin crawl.
ReplyDeleteWell, don't hold anything back!! :D I think this is the comment of the year right here... :D
DeleteThis is the first song I've heard from this album, but now I'm really curious to look into this further and see what else she's written for it. I've never had any particularly strong feelings about her one way or the other (in large part because I just haven't paid that much attention to her!), but I *was* upset over the publicity stunts during her relationship with Jake (I have a thing about that) and I have to say that I was a little stunned any of it even happened considering the age gap there...and also the way it just made zero sense whatsoever...and it's still weird to think about it...and did I mention it made no sense?!
But not knowing all that much about her beforehand or really keeping up with her even while all that was going on, I completely respect the strength of your opinion on her, and I am now very much looking forward to seeing how the promotion for the *rest* of this album goes...
I had to giggle . . "respect the strength of your opinion" . . yeah, I kinda did get a little extreme, didn't I? Well, I've had about enough of her that I can stomach. Some of my friends who have kids worship her (along with their kids) and think she's a "great role model." Sorry, but she's the Antichrist. Having makeup stands at your concerts for the little tween girlies to play with not only spreads disease (possibly) but encourages the little tarts to look older than their years. Not to mention, her constant insistence on writing songs that portray life as a fairytale . . which we all know (especially as we age) that it can't be farther from the truth. She tells all of these girls that their self-worth is found only by finding your "prince" or snagging a guy. Every single one of her songs revolves around how she's either been wronged in love or . . wait a second . . that's all they're about. And this whole thing about her writing about people in her life and giving 'clues' as to who it is -- that's just low. She sings about "haters" and how people are so mean to her . . then she turns around and writes these shitty, mean songs in retaliation to each guy she dates. Quite hypocritical. I could go on . . but I'm sure you get the gist.
DeleteLOL, I'm gonna keep giggling at my vitriol.
And see, this is EXACTLY the type of thing that I deep-down know goes on but patently avoid because it's too depressing: little girls at concerts walking up to makeup stands!! That is...awful. And spreading such the wrong message that I can't even find the words to adequately condemn it.
DeleteAs for what she writes about, I think that's the main reason why I haven't paid any more attention to her than I have. I kind of always classified her as being young and naive, but I wasn't sure how much of that was really her and how much was the act that she was selling. I did see a 60 Minutes interview with her in which someone called her "the voice of her generation" and I really did balk at that (I always thought of generational voices as saying more about the times than about boys). But I think what I'm really missing that you're seeing is a real life example of the effect she has as a role model. I guess that's just a luxury of not knowing any one (right now) in quite the right demographic!
But at any rate, you have free range to say whatever you want. :) I'm enjoying having an honest discussion here!! (As opposed to if we'd had this same conversation on ISJ!, where *inevitably* someone would have rushed forward to defend her because "if Jake likes her, she must be awesome," or something similar... :P)
Totally off-topic, but I've been meaning to ask you forever, did you ever see The Daily Show when it was in Tampa?! If yes, you totally have to spill all the details!!! :)
GAH, no! We never went because I got called for a job interview and my slot was that morning. Happily, I got the job [YAY!] and will be starting soon. It's a promotion and more $$ . . and in this freakin' economy, that's a super high priority. So, unfortunately . . no . . I didn't get to the show. :( I hope he comes back around!
DeleteCongrats on the job!! That's very exciting...and I'm sure you'll get another opportunity to see the show taped. (I had a feeling something had maybe come up and you hadn't gotten to go, but I did think about you when I was watching that week!)
DeleteThanks, my first day at the new jobby-job is Monday! :)
DeleteBack on topic . . can I say, I told you so???
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2220297/Taylor-Swift-The-Heartbreak-Queen-strikes-Is-singers-entire-album-ode-lost-love-Jake-Gyllenhaal.html
GOOD LUCK TOMORROW!!!
DeleteAnd wow, you TOTALLY pegged it! Well freaking done. I was already planning on putting up a post sometime in the not-too-distant future with some of her other songs so we could communally decide what she was telling us about Jake. I'm definitely going to have to do that now. :D
This post and the comments have really made me giggle!! For what it's worth I didn't even think of Jake when I heard it, just love the song for its 'cheesy-belting out in the car on the way to work-cheer me up-poppiness!!'
ReplyDeleteNow I'm gonna have to go listen to it again :)
Somehow, it makes it even more fun to listen to it while thinking about the inspiration behind it (my conflicted feelings, as mentioned in the next post, being entirely beside the point!). I played it for my mom a week or so ago and even she gave it two thumbs up. :) It's definitely catchy!!
DeleteTaylor Swift is overrated & is going to be a fat pig like her mom someday.
ReplyDelete