Tuesday, May 1, 2012

And then there were two.

Maggie Gyllenhaal and Peter Sarsgaard have again procreated.  Those of you who have read my book know that the birth of their first child in 2006 was a milestone in my life because…

…well, it’s complicated (read the book!), but basically because Stephen Gyllenhaal wound up chewing me out over US Weekly reading Just Jared and then I became disillusioned with Hollywood.  Or something.

Taking a drastically different approach for round 2, not only did Maggie and Peter keep her pregnancy under wraps for as long as possible this time, and then keep mum on the due date, they didn’t even tell anybody when they actually had the kid.  Gloria Ray arrived two Thursdays ago (!). 

The news just hit the internet yesterday, and HILARIOUSLY, US Weekly (obviously still stinging from the fact that I scooped them five and a half years ago), is announcing this story as an “exclusive."


(Equally hilarious is Just Jared's careful crediting of US Weekly.  Lessons learned all the way around, then, eh?)

And all of this is to say that the more I think about this, the more I would like to inflate my own sense of self-importance and take FULL CREDIT for Maggie and Peter having their second kid in secret, because, after all, it wasn't until I screwed it up for them the first time around that they thought to go the stealth route.  (I will also take credit for US Weekly freaking out over announcing it, and for Just Jared sucking up to them over it, because it'd be stupid of me not to.) 

The shadows of Babygate still darken the internet landscape.

Sometimes I think that I am a lost voice in the cacophony of modernity…but maybe, in reality, my power knows no bounds…

9 comments:

  1. I still cant believe i missed this whole thing! And yes, you can totally take 100% credit for this. :)

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    1. I still have no idea why I even knew she was pregnant, but for some reason, somewhere, I recently read that she was. And then BAM, she's not only got a baby, she's got a baby that's two freaking weeks old already!

      This would never have happened in 2006 when I was on top of my game. (I should have just told them I was retired and saved everyone involved all this effort. :D)

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  2. hehe it's not like you didn't anounce on ISJ huh??? They could've known long ago ;)

    I've seen a picture of her maybe around a month ago ... but yeah, my interest in others people lifes - whom I don't have any kind or personal contact with - is somewhat next to null.............

    Sasha

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    1. And I think that's EXACTLY what's so ironic about this whole thing...no one really cares this time around! The only reason it got so blown out of proportion the first time was because Jake was at the peak of his popularity, and public interest in the Gyllenhaal family was at an all time high.

      Now...not so much. And yet they went to all this trouble. But good for them, I guess, for doing it this time the way they wanted it to be done the first time (and, of course, congrats to US Weekly for finally getting its scoop...YEARS LATER...snicker. ;).

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    2. hehe - all that for nothing tho ........ I'm a bit gleeful these days *sorry-mebad*

      But at days end all that matters is they are happy with it all. :)

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  3. Maybe they didnt hide it, maybe just nobody cared enough lol. The past 6 months its been all about Jessica Simpson being pregnant!

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  4. oh that was me ^^^

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    1. :D

      Yeah, even *I* knew Jessica was pregnant, so it must have been pretty big news! I read somewhere that Maggie kept quiet until she was too big deny it, but I'm with you. Six years ago, there's no way she could have gotten to that point without people talking about it!

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